" />

Intimate Relationship Dynamics


In this comprehensive course, Dr. Steven Stosny shows how intimate relationship dynamics (IRDs) create cycles of resentment, hostility, and despair. More important, he shows how to overcome them.

IRDs are unconscious interactive patterns in which both parties automatically react to each other in set ways. You have the same argument or unpleasant discussion over and over.

Once an IRD gets activated, the content of the exchange, whether serious or trivial, doesn’t matter; both partners slip into their habitual reactions. Instead of working as a team to solve the problem, the partners see each other as the problem. They view each other as opponents at first, and eventually as enemies.

The best part of the course shows how to prevent IRDs and how to deactivate them when you slip back to old habits.


  • It Feels as If You’re in a Bad Play
  • The Demand-Withdraw Dynamic
  • The Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic
  • The Fear-Shame Dynamic
  • The Endless Treadmill of IRDs
  • The Nuclear-Powered Engine of IRDs
  • Binocular Vision
  • The Antidote to IRDs
  • Deactivating IRDs
  • Relationship Repair.

Each section consists of an mp4 video of a PowerPoint presentation narrated by Dr. Stosny. Each has a text component with quizzes and exercises.